i put you on just like a wedding dress

six days.

six days until the end, or beginning, of my life as i know it.

i am not in control. i never have been. i would like to think i have been. but i haven't.
that is an issue for me.
but as i said, i am learning.

...very slowly....

i am learning to live. i am learning to love. i am learning to compromise, communicate, encourage, and motivate. i am growing with every step i take. and i love it, but i have no idea where it is leading me. i have no idea where God is leading me. i think that is because no matter how mature i would like to think my faith is, it reverts back to immaturity at the snap of a finger. and there i am shoving God behind a door, using him when i need him... being cheap.

i put God on just like a wedding dress.
i use him when i need him and don't when i don't...
and it is hard to change old habits. very hard.

but i am trying.

saturday brings a new season. a new beginning. a new family. a new relationship.
i am excited, not nervous, anxious to be a wife. anxious to put on that wedding dress.

i am ready to be a bride. to be a bride to drew. and to be a bride to christ as He called us.
i am ready to make that commitment and to grow with it.